Christian Clichés are funny!!                                  

  • Well this time we have a nice letter from a Christian, and believe it or not, I actually answer him nicely, and seriously! I know you all are shocked, as I was... but hey I am a Squirrel full of surprises!!. This time I answer within the letter, and my responses will be in the BOLD text.

  • Name: Russ
  • Hi:
    I came across your web site because I was looking for a laugh. I will
    explain what I mean.I am a believer in Jesus, and have been for about 4 years. The whole reason I came to Him was that I was scared of going to hell (as it has
    been preached to me for years). Anyway, I never really found comfort in Jesus,
    or prayer, or Bible reading because I came to him on those terms. I was
    never sure of "my" salvation.

    I see. Then you actually had no good reason to believe in Jesus at all.
    Someone just scared you with the threat of hell. And after the scare of hell
    wore off you were never sure of your salvation? Wow. But I do not blame you,
    no one ever really is sure of their salvation, and depending upon who you
    talk to... you can lose it, or you will never lose, or if you lose it, you
    never really were a believer to begin with.

    Fortunately, I found a few good guys who were friends with me no matter
    what. However before them, it seemed like when I would go to people in
    the church for help, they would just give me some Christian Cliché that didn't
    make any sense (at least not to me). This was more frustrating than
    anything. As a result, me and a couple of my friends use clichés on each
    other just to be funny. This is why I searched the Internet and found your
    site; I needed new material.

    I can dig it.

    The bottom line is that I do believe Jesus loves us and died for our sins.
    I don't know exactly what that means, but I do know it brings comfort to
    me, but the biggest comfort of all is that it is not based on anything I/we
    have done, but is based on God's love.

    I see. You do not know what you believe in, but you believe in it anyway,
    right? I understand the comfort part all too well. It is kinda comforting
    to have a big imaginary friend in the sky that makes it all better once you
    are dead. I felt the comfort in it as well when I was a Christian. If you
    really think about it, the love of god is at a price, and a condition. You
    must take the action of accepting it at face value; that god loves you and
    wants nothing more than for you to live eternally with him. Then you have to
    keep the condition in effect; you must believe this thing to be true. If you
    violate any of the precepts of this belief as well, (as outlined by the
    bible) then you are in danger of losing the salvation according to some
    sects. Once Saved Not Always Saved. If you are of the Once Saved Always
    Saved group, then you are good to go, and just made to feel guilty about
    your continuing sin.

    In essence, the bible creates the solution to a problem it itself created.
    Sin. It would be like me cutting you with a knife in order to sell you a
    bandage that you did not need until I cut you. Know what I mean?

    Forgive me if I used any clichés in my note.
    Russ.

    It´s okay, this one is on the house.

    Squirrel

     


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