The Ultimate In Security!!

  • We have a goal. To be the best at what we do. And after many centuries of experience, we feel that we are finally there. We are the best. The best at what we do.
  • You can rest assured you are safe with Suck Ass Security Services. We have in our Portfolio a list of many famous and well know customers. Not once have we had one complaint from any of them. For any reason. A brief list:
...Jesus Christ...
"Forgive them,for they suck ass."

..Abraham Lincoln..

"That Boothe really sucked ass."
..Adolf Hitler..
"Suck Ass mit uns!"
"That grassy knoll sucked ass"
Julius Caesar
"Et Tu Suck Ass?"




If you would like to have a perfect opportunity to Suck Ass with us, we would love to have you aboard our little ship!! Please send your Résumé to the following address: